Character Corner

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Looking ahead to 2016

I’m starting to think of my goals for 2016…

Hard to believe it’s only a few weeks away!

My life’s about to majorly change, so I’m tempted to not set too many goals. 

However, I know the areas where setting realistic goals is appropriate. 

Going into the New Year with no plan doesn’t set well with me. 

2015 has been wonderful–challenging, but wonderful–and I firmly believe it’s because my goals were clear: Do the things I’ve always wanted to do. 

This is now a core belief of mine. Life’s too short to only dream. It’s time to do. 

So, you’ll be hearing from me soon with my 2016 goals. Until then I encourage you to be thinking on it too. 

I look forward to learning and growing with you in the new year. 

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The key to Christmas cheer

You are enough. Keep that in mind this Christmas season. 

The chatter at parties can quickly turn into brag fests by well meaning family and friends. 

My Susie got accepted into Harvard and Yale. 

Well, Billy is now the head of his department. 

What about you?

Uh…I’m about the same as last year. Everything is rocking along quite normally. 

There’s nothing wrong with being excited and sharing good news. When else can you tell all the family?

Just keep in mind that you’re not the center of the universe, the star of the show. 

On the flip side, don’t walk away from a Christmas gathering feeling like a failure because you can’t compete with the success of others. 

It’s not a competition! 

We’re all on different paths. Respect the differences, okay?

Christmas is the time for families to encourage each other and to reflect on the important things in life. 

It doesn’t have to be a stressful, overwhelming experience. 

Enjoy the egg nog and banter over a plate of Christmas fare. Remember, you are enough. Let yourself relax for once. 

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Merry Christmas Traffic

  I met Santa today!

Turns out he does all his last minute shopping at Wal-Mart too. 

Traffic was a bit crazy on my delivery route because everyone else just realized Christmas is next week. 

Be careful if you have to go out this weekend. 

Don’t lose your joy over a few extra minutes at a red light. 

And if you happen to see Santa this weekend, be sure to give him a word of encouragement and ask him what kind of cookies he actually wants on Christmas Eve. 

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Fences versus Prisons

“I’m cool with whatever. You decide.”

My friend looked at me with gracious (and patient) eyes as I sidestepped her question.

“I wish you’d tell me what you’re really thinking.”

The comment took me aback.

I am terrible at telling people what’s really going on inside of my head.

Never giving your input isn’t the ultimate form of humility and self-sacrifice.

You’re really hiding by slamming the door of trust and connection in someone’s face.

And you’re driving the people you love crazy.

I don’t care.

It doesn’t matter to me.

If that’s what you want to do.

We say these things, but deep down we do care and it does matter and you have wants.

It’s impossible to not care about everything.

(Can all of the exasperated people on the receiving end of these comments say, “Amen!“?)

I’m the world’s worst person at being an overly passive, peace loving person….

This is a real struggle for me.

My (un)natural tendency is to keep things buried deep down inside.

Another friend recently told me that standoffish nature in college held me back in many ways–and it’s true.

I kept people at arm’s length.

She expressed her thankfulness when I became a more open person. The change opened a lot of doors of opportunity that remained shut in years past.

Let me be very clear:

We all need to have boundaries and to guard our hearts. Prison bars and barbed wire fences, though, are a bit much.

Now, I’m building a nice fence that looks less like a maximum security prison and more like a simple property marker.

My challenge to you is to honestly answer the next question asked of you.

Can I get your opinion?

What do you prefer?

Is this something you want to do?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Just commit already!

Hesitation is the leading cause of road kill. 

Making decisions can be tough. We all want a road map, the quickest and surest way to success. 

There’s nothing wrong with planning–unless your planning leads to nowhere. 

At some point, you need to make a decision. 

Most people will agree with this statement. I can hear the amens now…

Our actions tell a different story. 

We hesitate. 

We become afraid. 

We get hit by a bus going 70 miles an hour. 

When you’re scared of commitment (just pick a side of the road already!) there are consequences. 

No one wants to become road kill. 

I’m convinced that the secret of confident people is not that they have it all figured out. 

They’re simply willing to commit. 

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On being nice

Let’s talk about being nice.

Did you know that you don’t have to agree with someone to be nice?

It is possible. 

Not everyone thinks your ideas are awesome. 

Not everyone goes to the same church as you. 

Not everyone…(fill in the blank)

And you can still be nice. 

There was a time when social media was fun and encouraging. 

I’m trying to stay positive, however, my newsfeed’s had nothing but garbage on it this week. 

This mean streak is disheartening because it’s not promoting the heart of Christ: His love of everyone on this planet. 

My encouragement to you, my friends, is to really think before you post. 

Just be nice. 

Show love. 

Promote respect. 

I know we can’t change the whole internet, but we can make our little corner of it a brighter space. 

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A gratitude muscle workout

Today’s post will be short and sweet. 

It’s been a long week and I’m really tired. But, my gratitude far outweighs the negatives. 

Here are 5 things I’m thankful for from the past week:

  1. My job. I have a great job that’s been nothing but a blessing. Sure, there have been challenges, but those challenges have only helped me grow as a person. 
  2. My second job. All of my late nights are paying off! Money for school is being provided through this opportunity. 
  3. Deaf church. I have the privilege to serve in a wonderful church community. My signing would not be where it is today without the help of the church members. 
  4. Comfortable shoes. I could tell a BIG difference in all my running around because I chose comfort over fashion. My feet haven’t been screaming, which is a gift in itself. 
  5. A sense of humor. Being able to see the funny side of things makes life easier and more entertaining. 

What are some things you’re thankful for?

I’m finding that a habit of thanksgiving is changing my perception of life’s challenges. 

Let’s work out our gratitude muscle this week by taking 5 minutes a day to name 3 reasons we’re thankful. 

The difference this single practice makes in our lives is huge. 

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Emotional traffic jam

I’m struggling with what to talk about. 

This is one of those nights when the thoughts in my head are taking up a lot of room. 

It’s my practice to not share things that are still fresh. The emotions are too hard for me to juggle. 

Maybe that’s the safe route, the boring route, but I just can’t do it right now. 

And before you get too concerned, everything is fine. No one is hurt or dead. 

The traffic jam of thoughts has me cloudy and a bit unsure. 

Has this ever happened to you?

How do you handle emotional traffic jams?

Some bloggers know how to navigate and share accordingly. I’ve read their blogs and admire their bravery. 

Then there’s me…

The girl who spends more time talking around her feelings than about them. 

The girl whose hands get shaky sharing her thoughts on a good day. 

Sorry that you’re stuck with me for now. 

I’m a work in progress. 

The truth shall set you free, right?

Now, to publish this post before I chicken out….

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Fumes and a prayer

Prayers start going up fast when I’m sitting on empty, which happens about once a week because I still haven’t learned my lesson. 

Waiting until the last possible second to buy gas is not a good idea. 

  • No matter how cheap gas is on the other side of town. 
  • No matter if you have to make a U-turn to get into the station. 
  • No matter how cold or hot it is outside. 

Stop and buy the gas!

Russian roulette is a bad game to play late at night on the freeway. 

Driving on fumes and a prayer can only get you so far. 

I made it home safely tonight, but my procrastination almost landed me in the dog house. 

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Getting real

You don’t have to say everything that’s on your mind. 

In fact, I highly encourage you not to say everything. The amount of trouble I’ve gotten myself into by sharing my opinion too openly is ridiculous. 

Much of my heartache could’ve been avoided–if only I’d shut my mouth!

But there’s a flip side to this topic as well. 

I also tend to not tell people how I really feel or think. The natural peacekeeper in me hates conflict of any kind. 

And, no, I don’t have multiple personalities. 

It’s just that I over talk about the trivial things and not say enough when it matters. 

Can anyone else relate?

This is a real struggle for me. 

I’ve bitten my tongue so hard it’s drawn blood when I needed to speak and then blabbed about something trivial–like a movie or a singer’s latest album–for several minutes. 

Staying surface would be so much easier because there’s absolutely no risk. Funny, though, how you can’t talk about faith in Christ without going deep. 

I’m not saying to shove religion down someone’s throat or to act like a weirdo with no social skills either. 

The sincerity I’m referring to comes from being intimately seen and known:

  • Your strengths and weaknesses are out in the open. 
  • You have nothing to hide and nothing to lose. 

I’m not going to lie. This kind of intimacy frightens me. God and I continue to talk about this aspect of faith. 

The Bible gives us clear instructions, which trumps any apprehensive emotions I experience. 

We are called to live vulnerably. 

At work. 

At home. 

At church. 

Paul told the believers at Corinth to imitate me as I imitate Christ (1 Corinthians 11:1). 

His life was an open book–on purpose. 

I’m all about boundaries and I’m not promoting keeping toxic relationships on life support. However, our need for comfort and control is keeping us from being open. 

We all talk about “being real” but do we really understand what this means?