blogging

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Birthday Wishes to a Great Friend

bffl faveI’m going to do something completely cheesy today.

This blog post is dedicated to my friend, Bethany Fletcher, in honor of her birthday.

We met in college and became friends instantly….NOT!

In fact, I remember the time she told me that the first time we hung out in a big group she went to her room and cried. She also used to lock the door on her side of our Jack and Jill style bathroom suite.

Eventually, though, she and I realized (and began to appreciate) all of the individual qualities that make us both awesome. christmas friends

Bethany taught me about many things, but for some I am eternally grateful:

  1. Fashion–thanks for helping me get past dressing like a granny.
  2. Music–my previous musical tastes involved a lot of Reba and Patsy Cline. I’m still their number one fan, but my musical taste has broadened–a lot.
  3. Blogging–if it wasn’t for Bethany, I would not be a blog lover today.
  4. Encouragement–this chick has walked with me and encouraged me through some pretty dark times. She’s also slapped me back into reality, but it’s always followed by a hug.
  5. Jesus–Bethany’s friendship with our Savior is out of this world. Seriously. I’ve always looked to her example in how to live, love, and serve Jesus.

Bethany, I hope you’re okay with me dedicating a whole blog post to you. It’s just that you know I’m horrible at sending out cards…..but I do want you to know that I am thankful for your friendship.

bffl pumpkinHappy Birthday, BFFL!

I hope that your 26th year is awesome.

Know that my thoughts and prayers are always with you and, of course, Mr. Fletcher.

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An amazing and sustaining grace

Many of the bloggers I enjoy following are so bold. They take fierce stands on hard topics and ride the criticism like surfers ride waves.

I’ve deleted everything 5 times today.200 words here, 150 words there. The thought of hitting publish made me queasy.

Playing it safe is a hard trap to escape.

How many times have we talked about being bold? Being unafraid? Not hiding?

Your fearless leader was a coward today.

She cried over what to make for dinner. Seriously. This happened. When told to put something together for dinner I freaked out. The need for approval and the fear of rejection collided in the perfect storm.

Over dinner.

Today is not the first time I’ve struggled with words and dinner either. Today is simply the first time I’ve had the courage to talk about it.

Dear Friends,

I have a hard time making choices without a plan and saying things without fearing the opinions of others.

Sincerely,

Tired-of-being-scared Audra

Yesterday I talked about Bold Christians vs. Sissy Christians. (Insert face palm.)

Sorry about that…

I strongly agree with what I said, but you need to read today’s post for a much needed addendum.

It’s hard to be a Bold Christian when you cry over dinner planning. (This is what’s been haunting me all day.)

But remember what I said about grace for the lost?

Grace is for Christians too. There are no double standards with Jesus.

Look at Romans 5:

10 For if when we were enemies we were reconciled to God through the death of His Son, much more, having been reconciled, we shall be saved by His life. 11 And not only that, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received the reconciliation.

If grace and love is available while we were sinners, grace and love will sustain us even more when we become Christians.

Learning how to extend grace to yourself can be hard. We see our fallacies and failures so clearly. Remember, though, that grace gives us new vision–for others and for ourselves.

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Surviving an emotional hangover

Have you ever had an emotional hangover?

You share something really personal and the next day you think:

“Why did I do that?!? I should’ve kept my mouth shut.”

I’m a pretty private person, which might seem like a strange statement since I blog every day. We share 200-300 words a day, right? Daily blogging has been a stretching experience for me.

Allowing people into my head space every single day is scary. I’m like a Puritan when it comes to my emotions. If my ankles are showing that’s just too much!

There have been many times I’ve shared with you guys and felt sick to my stomach.

“Did I say too much? What did I just do?”

I only bring this up now because I’m working on a project with my dad and stepmom. You’ll get to hear more about my reconciliation journey. For those who are unfamiliar with my story, this series would be a good one to follow. (And that’s all I’m going to say for now.)

This project will be a BIG stretch for me…

I need to find a nice rock to rent and a stash of brown paper bags.

I realize this post is a bit melodramatic. (Aren’t hyperboles fun?)

No one likes vulnerability, but we all crave it. We’re constantly watching and testing those around us to see if they’re genuine.

And yet, many of us are so scared to share.

Dear friend, I’m right there with you!

Fight the urge to hide, okay?

Hiding helps no one.

Find an outlet to share your gifts and stories with others.

Know that I’m here to help you however I can.

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Internet 101: Is this my pride talking?

Is social media fueling our pride?

I can’t get this question out of my head. Awareness is one thing, but shameless plugs about our good deeds is another.

What is our motive when sharing things online?

Proverbs 27:2 says:

“Let another man praise you, and not your own mouth; A stranger, and not your own lips.”

Jesus said:

3 But when you do a charitable deed, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, 4 that your charitable deed may be in secret; and your Father who sees in secret will Himself reward you openly” (Matthew 6:3-4).

These are the verses that are influencing my thoughts on this subject.

It’s a toughie….

nothingerasedI grew up as a people pleaser who lived in the shadows, always pushing others into the light. I used to think that’s what it meant to be humble.

And then I came to understand true humility–and it had nothing to do with my misconstrued beliefs about self-worth.

My discomfort now has nothing to do with my self-image. It has everything to do with the question of necessity.

Does everyone need to know that I did this? (Whatever “this” may be)

I have given money, support, and time to plenty of things. Normally, though, I ask to not be included in any online shout outs. There are exceptions, of course, but I will opt out whenever possible.

This post is not my legalistic attempt at being perceived as holy either. (That voice is screaming in my ear right now.)

I want us to have a conversation about this topic. I want to navigate these murky waters with you.

And I can’t ask you to engage in a conversation with me if I can’t be honest first.

Drop me a comment with your thoughts.

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Confessions of a leadership stalker

I have a few problems. They’re serious too.

  • Book ADD
  • YouTube ADD
  • Blog ADD
  • Podcast ADD

If I hear about a speaker, author, pastor, etc. on a podcast or blog, I will immediately go to the library’s website and see how many of their books are available to check out.

Then I go to YouTube and find all of the videos of them speaking.

Then I go to the podcasts site and find all the podcasts.

Then I go to their website and blog.

I'm holding you hostage for your knowledge!

I’m holding you hostage for your knowledge!

This is called leadership stalking. (No, it’s not in any official medical journals, but it should be.)

My illness is in overdrive this week because of the Influence and Impact Summit (link below).

Nothing will stop me from this craziness. I just want to learn from this person–right now!

If your list of acceptable teachers can fit on a Post It note, you need to upgrade to a larger piece of paper.

There’s nothing wrong with having a big pool of teachers. I am a big believer in learning from those around me.

And, a note to my Christian friends who are afraid to broaden their horizons, if you apply common sense and your Jesus Filter (aka The Bible) you can learn from anyone.

In today’s world, there’s no reason for us to not be learning.

You will never arrive at a place where you know it all. No one likes a know it all anyway!

We have so much information at our fingertips that a 13th century monk would be crying if he ever came back for a visit.

Take advantage of all available resources, especially when they’re free!

Don’t be afraid to become an ADD learning junkie.

There are gifts inside of you that the world needs.

Now, get busy learning how to use them.

Influence and Impact Summit:

http://www.influenceandimpactsummit.com/

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Picture window thoughts

Does it bother you that my topics are random?

I realize that my posts range from super serious to total goof ball-ness (Yes, I just made up this word).

But that’s how my brain works….

I’m trying to find a flow in my daily blogging and become more consistent, especially if I say that I’ll finish talking about something the next day.

My thoughts, though, flitter and fly like a hummingbird. Or they attack a subject like a shark, leaving nothing but the bones behind.

No, I’m not ADD either.

I just love big ideas, the overarching principles that shape thinking.

Nitpicking tunnel vision bothers me. You lose sight of the grand design that way.

I’m not arguing against taking a strong stance, but I’m coming to believe more and more that you can have strong beliefs without needing to discredit and destroy those who are different from you.

I try to focus all my energy on building character and helping others.

No one benefits when you’re an idea bully.

Maybe your idea is the best. Kudos to you.

But no one likes a bully–even a correct one.

Don’t claim up and never share what’s important to you either.

Just remember that what’s important to you right now might not be important to someone else.

I think of it like this:

Friends have the right to share ideas, so it’s always better to be a friend as opposed to being an enemy.

So, we’re back to where we started: The randomness of my blogs.

I prefer the bigger picture, which is probably why I’ve always loved picture windows, mountain top views, and aerial shots.

My goal is for us to engage in meaningful conversations around the posts.

I want us to dig deeper into the whys (a big reason “daring to dig deeper” is my tagline) while keeping our eyes on the horizon, the bigger picture.

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Internet 101: Don’t write opinion (I mean, open) letters

I’ve noticed a lot of open letters floating around the internet.

Did you know there’s even a definition for them?

An open letter is:

“A letter, often critical, addressed to a particular person or group of people but intended for publication.”

Here’s Audra’s definition:

“An letter is your opinion–masked in self-righteousness–and broadcasted to the world because you don’t actually have a voice in that person or group’s life.

Own up to your opinion, okay?

Don’t hide behind an open letter and say, “Just sayin’…you (and the rest of the world) needed to know.”

Letters–real letters–are very personal. Someone took the time to sit down and express their thoughts. It went out to a special person and led to a deeper relationship.

Blasting out hate mail in the form of an open letter is wrong. Plain and simple.

I’m not saying there haven’t been good open letters too.

But everyone knows the truth.

A letter to “the poor, lonely soul in the corner” is about the writer expressing their opinion as another “poor, lonely soul in the corner”. (To all poor, lonely souls: Please don’t stay that way because I stopped an open letter from being written to you.)

I hope open letters are not how our generation chooses to communicate.

I don’t see the need to write open letters.

If I want to share my opinion, I’ll just blog about it.

Wait a minute!!!!!

You mean my blog is entirely based on my perception of the world?

Like an open letter?

Mind blown.

There are so many ways to express yourself online–without hiding behind anything.

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My new internet home

Welcome to my new internet home!

I want to give a big shout out to my friend, Haley Hester, for designing the logo and the website. This would not have happened without her.

If you’d like her help with a project, send her an email at: haleycoe2015@gmail.com

Switching to a self-hosted website was one of my top goals for 2015. Now that this goal is accomplished, my creative juices are flowing….

But the main purpose of my blog is still the same.

I want us to have honest, meaningful conversations about the things that matter most.

That’s why my new tagline is “Daring to dig deeper”.

All too often, we never stop to think about why we think the way we do.

The cry of our culture is to respect differences and individuality. And yet, most of us don’t even know what we believe.

How can I respect your beliefs if I don’t even know mine?

And that’s why I wanted to blog every day.

I wanted to capture my thoughts and explore where they are coming from. It’s way too easy to bookmark an issue for another day.

Unfortunately, another day turns into another year, which becomes another decade.  

I don’t have that kind of time.

I am daring to dig deeper today—right now—because understanding what I believe and being able to talk about it is the most important thing I can do with my time.

In tomorrow’s post, I will talk more about the logo. Until then, poke around the new site.

Please let me know what you like, what you don’t like, and what you’d like to see.

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Help Wanted!

My birthday is a week from today.

Do you know what that means?

Daily blogs are about to begin!!!

I know that my consistency has been, well, pretty bad in my test drive, which leads to my next point:

 

As you can see, my blogging muscle isn't quite ripped yet.

As you can see, my blogging muscle isn’t quite ripped yet.

Three things I hope to gain by doing this little experiment.

1. Discipline. (Did you see that coming?)

2. Better writing skills. (I have a long way to go.)

3. Idea development. (It’s time to flesh out the ideas that fly around my head.)

With these things in mind, I need some help!

audra needs helpWhat are some topics that you, my faithful reader, want me to write about?

Even with all of my ideas, 365 days of posting is a lot to undertake with no help.

And, I want to open up my blog to guest bloggers as well. Bring in some fresh blood to generate good conversation amongst ourselves. Maybe you might write a post? (I’d really, really like that btw.)

Please share your thoughts. I realize that a lot of my reasoning for writing everyday is for my character development, but a blog without readership is quite boring….

That’s all I have for today.

I am very excited about the next year. This is the most challenging thing I have ever committed to doing. Honestly, I have no predictions for where this will lead. I just know that it’s something that I need to do.

Thank you for going on this journey with me.

Comment below with your suggestions!

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Vote for your dreams!

It’s June.

Do you know what that means?

2015 New Year celebration with the date outlined by colourful fiery sparklers on a dark New Year's Eve night

We are halfway through 2015.

I’m a big believer in evaluating progress, so I have been thinking through my goals. In some areas, I’m doing pretty good (blogging and sign language). In other areas, I need more work (running and Bible reading).

Today, a quote from Napoleon Dynamite popped into my head:

“If you vote for me, all of your wildest dreams will come true.” –Pedro Sanchez

Isn’t it hard to work toward your dreams?

There are so many things begging for our attention: Internet, TV, and all the flavors of social media.

dream voteI can make up a million excuses. In fact, in thinking about my year so far, I have made over a million excuses, forfeiting valuable time because I am scared or apathetic or both.

Our most valuable asset in this life is time.

How many times have you heard this statement?

“If you want to know what’s most important to you, look at how you spend your time.”

I have brushed this statement off as a dusty, old motivational speaker cliché, but it’s so true! My biggest problem is how I consistently waste time on meaningless things.

Our dreams, much like Pedro Sanchez, need our votes to survive. Our dreams are campaigning daily for our attention.

new-years-resolutionThere are so many things I want to do. I know that it will take a lot of hard work on my part.

My wimpy, inconsistent self is pitching a fit because it’s getting the workout of its life. It would rather watch movies and sleep in every morning.

For this reason, my goal for the remainder of this year is to be mindful of my time.

How we spend our time truly is the best measuring stick when it comes to evaluating progress.