Character Corner

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Under the radar 

I had a couple of friends in high school who were really good at serving in the shadows. 

This wasn’t a false attempt to be humble. 

This wasn’t a diminishing of their talents. 

They simply understood what it meant to be a servant. The motives of their hearts are still the purest I’ve ever seen. 

I noticed their actions–so did others–as thankless work was done with joy. It’s always convicted me of the pride that tries to creep up in my heart. 

I want a servant’s heart, but it can be difficult to cultivate in a media driven, rockstar culture. 

My earnest belief is that all work is good work. Giving certain jobs the title of “elite” is a dangerous practice. 

Doctors and janitors, lawyers and plumbers, businessmen and garbage collectors all deserve to be treated with respect. 

I try and praise the hard, thankless work as well as the more public, commendable tasks. 

Let’s focus our attention on honoring and encouraging each other in the workplace this week. 

A simple thank you can go a long way. 

And, while we’re at it, let’s be sneaky and serve under the radar too. 

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Making history

What are some moments in history you would love to be a part of? 

I have several:

  • Fighting for civil rights in the’60s
  • Working in America during World War II (think Rosie the Riveter)
  • Helping at a revival during the Jesus Movement
  • Watching the Wright Brothers fly the first plane
  • Going out west as a pioneer

There are a TON of other moments, but these are my favorites. 

As a child my imagination aided in my learning and loving of history. I wanted to make history some day. In fact, I still do. 

The likelihood of it happening is slim, but it’s one of those childhood fantasies that won’t relent. 

But it got me to thinking of all my favorite historical figures. Very few set out to be famous for their contributions. 

They were simply dedicated, passionate individuals who refused to go against their convictions, to remain idle when they could act. 

This is the example I want to follow. 

This is the kind of life I want for myself. 

If it happens to put me in history books, fine. If not, I consider the joy of an actionable life worthy of all my efforts. 

The best people I know are not well known by the masses, but those of us who are fortunate enough to rub shoulders with them pray for half an ounce of their character, courage, and tenacity. 

The narratives of history are great. I’m glad for all of its lessons–good and bad–because history is a wonderful teacher. 

I encourage you all, though, to live with purpose and intensity for the right reasons. 

There are plenty of wonderful lives to study, if you need proof of what I’m talking about today. They can be found in libraries or your own backyard. 

Making a difference is much more important than making history. 

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To whom much is given

7-christmas-tree-backgroundChristmas time is here.

Gifts will be filling up living rooms across the country. Kids are writing out lists for their families. Parents are working extra shifts to pay for these gifts.

The Christmas spirit is taking over our brains as we speak.

But what about those of us who won’t have any presents under the tree?

Whose parents are working hard just to feed their families with no money left to spare?

Kids who wish for new clothes as much as they do for a new toy?

Every Christmas, these questions bombard my mind.

I can’t help but think of the verse that says, “For everyone to whom much is given, from him much will be required; and to whom much has been committed, of him they will ask the more” (Luke 12:48).

The needs are great this Christmas–as they are all throughout the year. Something about the season of giving, though, make the needs more evident.

In other words, we’re paying attention.

What can we commit to doing this year to help others?

One of the goals for this blog is to help others. That’s my aim every time I share with you. I want this community to become a place that recognizes and meets needs.

I plan on giving money to the Big Oak Ranch, a local children’s home, to buy presents for the children in their care.

If this is something you’d be interested in doing, here’s the link:

Big Oak Ranch Christmas

Let me know what you plan on doing to give back.

Remember: To whom much is given, much is required.

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One thankful girl

Happy Thanksgiving!

It’s hard to believe 2015 is almost over.

It’s hard to believe that I’ve accomplished so much this year. 

Blogging everyday, learning sign language, running a half marathon, and going to Rhema?

Wow. I am a truly thankful. 

Here’s few other things I’m thankful for:

  1. My family. I have a big family and it only keeps growing. I’m an aunt now and we’ve added a lot of cousins. 
  2. My friends. I’m thankful for my friends who’re actually more like family. They’ve been with me through everything. I’m also thankful for new friends. The Lord continues to send the most amazing people into my life. 
  3. My job. I have a great job. It’s been nothing but a blessing since day one. 
  4. Reading. I’m really close to my goal of 50 books. The gift of reading is something that I do not take lightly. 

I can go on and on…

How about you?

What are you thankful for this year?

Take some time to write it out. 

Talk about it with your family over dinner.

 Praise God for being the giver of all these precious gifts. 

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The thing about advice

Beware of “If it was me” statements. 

You know the ones I’m talking about…

  • If it was me, I wouldn’t go there. 
  • If it was me, I wouldn’t do this or that. 
  • If it was me, he/she wouldn’t have gotten away with that behavior. 

I am bad about making these blanket, hypothetical statements. 

There’s nothing wrong with different temperaments and personalities. Being different is not the enemy. 

On the other hand, doing stupid, sinful things is a problem and I’m not condoning bad behavior. 

Not everyone, though, is asking for my advice and not everyone cares what I think. 

Sharing these kinds of thoughts in conversation with others can quickly morph into gossip and criticism sessions as well. 

Just be careful with your words. 

I can’t stress this topic enough because it’s of utmost importance. 

Being rude and tactless is not an effective tool for anyone who wants to have a place of influence in another’s life. 

I’ve also seen these rash, unfiltered comments slam shut the door of the gospel. 

Every word counts, every word is powerful, and every word either builds or destroys. 

Think about that the next time your mouth gets away from you. 

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Shortcuts and Backroads

  Who doesn’t like a shortcut?

Winding country roads, jaunts through neighborhoods, an alleyway….

The GPS gives us the fastest route first. Our friends know all the best back ways. 

Shaving off travel time is important, but you can’t take shortcuts in relationships. 

A lot of people think that the restoration journey between my dad and I took place overnight. 

Let me be the first to answer that assumption with a hearty no. 

It’s been 5 years and counting. Yes, we’ve come a long way, but we still have quite the journey in front of us. 

I encourage you to be intentional in your relationships. Good relationships don’t just happen by chance. They take work. 

This is probably not news to most of you, but knowing something and still choosing the romantized version is the norm. 

In today’s world of social media friends, it’s easy to forget that you actually have to hang out with your friend offline in order for  that person to be a real friend. 

I’m not dissing the use of social media to keep up with friends and family that live far away either. 

Many people, though, only have online friends–far away or otherwise. 

There are no shortcuts to meaningful relationships. You have to put miles on your tires and wear out some shoe leather. 

You won’t regret the extra miles. 

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Simple gifts

What’s the best meal you ever had?

Was it a complicated, picture worthy affair? Or was it simpler fare with a close friend or family member?

I remember this one meal with a close relative. He diced up hot dog wieners and put them in a pan with tomato paste, a dash of garlic powder, and some Italian seasoning. 

That was it.

 He stirred it up, got it warm, and dished it out generously on our plates. 

I felt like a queen. Life was going good for this 9 year old! 

I “learned” a new recipe and spent the evening enjoying myself and the time with my relative. 

How many times do we agonize over big, fancy meals? 

How many times do we stress out over minor issues, berating and belittling our family in the process?

There’s nothing wrong with great food, but missing out on the important moments is not worth the exchange. 

The things we attach a memory to are quite small. 

Filet mignon on vacation might be overlooked while cheese and crackers on Tuesday is precious. 


Thanksgiving is a week away. 

Cook up a feast! 

Eat yourself silly. 

Clean up later if a fun opportunity presents itself afterward. 

Just don’t stress out over the inconsequential elements of the celebration. 

Remember: It’s the simple moments of intentionality that make the holidays special–not a gourmet meal. 

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Safety vs. Risk

The key word in terrorism is terror and the purpose of terror is to put fear in our hearts. 
The debate over the Syrian refugees really has me thinking….

Maybe all the articles and videos about ISIS turning us against the refugees isn’t that far off. 

Let’s look at the facts:

  1. Most of the terrorists were European nationals
  2. ISIS magazines and videos state that they want the Muslim world to hate the West
  3. The other outbreaks of ISIS related activity following the Paris attacks should not to be surprised since the point is evoking terror (and it worked so well the first time)
  4. Most of Europe–and now America–is not helping the refugees. 

With these facts in mind, is terrorism winning?

Our culture continues to respond exactly the way the enemy wants. 

Instead of talking out solutions, governors are making rash statements that lack  empathy and reek of platform building stances.  

These actions remind me of our nation’s–and the world’s history. 

Hasty judgment is prevailing. 

Ignoring the suffering refugees will not make this problem disappear. I recognize the concerns about safety. I want to be safe too. 

I’m torn, though, because helping the refugees means there’s a risk involved….

But isn’t there always a risk involved?

I don’t claim to have all the answers. The reason I’m writing this out is to think this issue through. 

I’m just wondering if our concerns and fears about safety are allowing the tenets of terrorism to prevail. 

What are your thoughts on this topic?

 

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Guard your response 

Be careful who you offload on….

Have you ever waited on hold for longer than 30 minutes and no one has a solution to your problem?

Talk about a frustrating situation. 

I’m not proud to say that on many occasions my response was not what it should’ve been. 

Yes, I repented and felt guilty–the whole gamut–but you can’t take back your words.

Let me say that again: You can never take back your words. 

The quicker you learn to surrender your tongue to the authority of the Holy Spirit, the better. 

Getting frustrated at the customer service men and women–most of whom are from India–will not make your problems go away. 

Frustration only begets more frustration. 

I’m not trying to excuse companies with poor customer service or faulty products. 

It’s just that our angry dialogues to customer service representatives aren’t changing anything. 

So why waste your breath?

Why work yourself into a frenzy?

The only person who ends up looking bad and feeling worse is you. 

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The opportunities in your reality

Did you ever watch The Brady Bunch movie?

It was a spoof from the ’90s that was not that great, but made me laugh nonetheless. In it, Mike Brady gave Bobby some great advice:

“Wherever you go, there you are.”

I’ve seen this “advice” plastered all over novelty items. (I also googled the saying and found out it’s the title of a meditation book. Go figure.) What a goofy thing to say, right? We all know that…..or do we?

Recently, I was part of a conversation where a friend said, “Do you know what I could be doing?” and then went on for about 10 minutes about a job he could have.

I told this friend,  “You’re right and I agree. But here you are, so what are you going to do?”

There’s nothing wrong with dreaming or wanting to better yourself. Just remember that improvement starts right where you are. The weaknesses we possess do not magically disappear with a new opportunity.

The more I listened to my friend, the more I understood that the root of the problem was not feeling appreciated. Maybe an elevated position, a better job would do the trick. These people would appreciate me. These people see my true potential.

Once again, there’s truth in these thoughts. There’s nothing wrong with getting praised and honored for good work. Just be careful that praise and accolades aren’t the primary motivators. Applause is momentary–and it’s fickle too.

Motivation really is everything.

What are you looking to gain from an opportunity?

Be honest.

Answering this one question will show you the motivations of your heart.

Like I said earlier, the messy parts of ourselves–the things we want to leave behind–won’t disappear. You can’t just move on and not leave the new address.

Look around. There’s a lot to learn, a lot to do right, where you are now. Don’t be afraid to dream, but don’t ignore the opportunities in your current reality either.