My Thoughts on the Turner Case

I don’t know if you’ve heard about the Brock Turner case, but it’s got a lot of us thinking about the issue of rape. 

Buzzfeed News published an article that was powerful. The rape victim (I don’t know the young woman’s name or I would use it) issued a statement following Turner’s sentencing.

This is not for the faint of heart, okay? Don’t read this if you get queasy or anything. The whole situation is just a mess…

Should the woman have been drinking? Does that even matter?

How can Turner get such a light sentence?

In my mind, there’s no way what happened was consensual. Not with the statements of the 2 men on bicycles who chased Turner. 

And I frankly don’t care anything about Turner’s college prospects or how fast he swims. That shouldn’t even matter in a trial about sexual assault.

Some are pointing fingers at the disparities between the classes and the justice system. I can see how that conclusion was reached. If this was just about anyone else, the judge would not have given such a light sentence. 

Bright future or not, Turner made a bad choice. The consequences of that choice are supposed to be steep. He’s not a little boy, so his punishment should reflect that.

I am sad because justice was not served. Two lives were shattered (as well as their families’ lives). The victim was treated like the perpetrator and the perpetrator was treated like a victim. 

My college experience was VERY different because of where I went to school, but there were still a lot of young ladies who made poor choices.

For all of my college aged friends, please be careful. I’m especially thinking of all my friends at Judson. 

Be smart. Stay safe.

Guard your response 

Be careful who you offload on….

Have you ever waited on hold for longer than 30 minutes and no one has a solution to your problem?

Talk about a frustrating situation. 

I’m not proud to say that on many occasions my response was not what it should’ve been. 

Yes, I repented and felt guilty–the whole gamut–but you can’t take back your words.

Let me say that again: You can never take back your words. 

The quicker you learn to surrender your tongue to the authority of the Holy Spirit, the better. 

Getting frustrated at the customer service men and women–most of whom are from India–will not make your problems go away. 

Frustration only begets more frustration. 

I’m not trying to excuse companies with poor customer service or faulty products. 

It’s just that our angry dialogues to customer service representatives aren’t changing anything. 

So why waste your breath?

Why work yourself into a frenzy?

The only person who ends up looking bad and feeling worse is you. 

Ending well

Bad days happen. 

Today was one of them…

My entire afternoon was wasted. 

It was a situation where I’m partly to blame because I didn’t push hard enough for an answer (an answer that would have saved me three hours). 

I left the store with tears stinging my eyes while also being extremely angry. 

Not fun…

I’m not a super emotional person, so emotional situations wear me out. 

The evening got better, though, when I watched the new Cinderella with the kiddos. 

We had popcorn and everything. 

 

Courage is king of the popcorn bowl

 
Rainy days–and bad days too–rarely stop kids from having fun. Their innocence is such a sweet gift. 

I want my siblings to stay as innocent as possible, to never lose the gift of finding joy in all situations. 

It’s easy for adults to be cynical. 

I hate that…

I want to be more like my little brothers and sisters. 

Their ability to trust and forgive and love and laugh amazes me. 

I never want them to lose that resilience. 

The day was pretty stinky, but it ended well. 

Hard Truths

I’m a bit disappointed right now. Someone I love very dearly is suffering the consequences of poor decision making. They couldn’t see beyond their situation to the bright future ahead. All that was in sight was the fallout from others’ bad choices. So much so that my friend’s ability to choose a different outcome became blurred, lost in the smoke.

Do you know what the hardest part for me is? I couldn’t help my friend.

Talking did nothing. Tough love did nothing. A great number of family and friends reached out but none of us could make the final decision and bring about a positive outcome.

Can you relate?

Have you ever been so frustrated at a friend or loved one who refuses to change despite the obvious self-destruction taking place?

It’s hard to watch someone acquiesce to second best experiences.

I apologize for being a bit worked up. My heart is aching as I think about the brokenness in my friend. And this is not a singular incident. I’m tired of watching my friends and family strike out left and right.

How about you?

I realize I’m asking a lot of questions today but it’s only because I need some answers. Strike that. I know the answers but sometimes the truth’s hard to swallow.

Here’s the truth: Blame cannot easily be laid on others when the choice has always been ours. It’s hard to watch someone falsely believe that they can’t do any better. Or for someone to know they can do better but wonder what’s the point.

This is why I’m really struggling today. I watched someone make the wrong choice. And there was nothing I could do to stop it.

Maybe you guys can help me. I’ve come to grips with the reality that it’s out of my hands. But that doesn’t make it any easier.