“Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.” (Proverbs 27:6)
It’s hard to think of wounds being a sign of love.
But wouldn’t you rather a friend correct you, to notice and care about the decisions you are making?
This is a silly illustration, but it’s a classic:
Having a piece of spinach stuck in your teeth all day, but no one tells you.
What’s the first thing you say?
Why didn’t you tell me?!?!?
Ouch moments are great tests of character.
Nothing says “there’s still room for growth” like your mistakes being noticed.
When facing an ouch moment, I have to battle three things: embarrassment, anger, and pride.
I have to filter all of these feelings–as well as who’s doing the noticing–before responding.
Please don’t read this and think I’m talking about rolling over and letting someone squash you like a bug.
Remember what the proverb said?
Faithful are the wounds of a friend.
Friends correct out of love. They are lovingly pointing out your mistakes–not rubbing it in your face or shaming you in the process.
Friends are trying to help you.
If all of your friends are kissing your cheeks and telling you how awesome you are….well, read the rest of the proverb, okay?
In a healthy friendship, each person grows.
Here’s another proverb:
As iron sharpens iron, so a man sharpens the countenance of his friend. (Proverbs 27:17)
If I’m not careful, I can resent correction. My natural inclination is to believe that others are out to get me.
But that attitude is destructive, which is why I have to beat it down daily.
Meaningful friendships are worth more than gold.
We need to give our friends permission to notice things –even the not so great things.