Note to Self: Avoid the Success Trap

Help Wanted: So, I need to up my game. Everyday blogging begins a month from tomorrow and I am not doing so hot in my practice round… guys hold me accountable, okay?

don't forgetI want to return to our Note to Self series and begin with an area where our worth is most attacked:

Our jobs.

Most of us spend 40 hours a week or more at our jobs. I know many people want to believe that work doesn’t matter. I understand the logic behind this thought. In the grand scheme of life, work is only one part of our identities.

However, I think anything that consumes 40+ hours of our time is important. Or should I say, because it’s a major time investment, our viewpoint about work is important.

I spend more time at my job than I do anywhere else. I can’t speak of any other region in America, but in the South having the right job title or working for a certain company is a big status symbol. Success is tied the company–not to you–so a lot is riding on where you work.

success exit

 A few months ago, I came face to face with this reality because a comment from a high school acquaintance of mine was relayed back to me. This friend is doing quite well and was asking how I was doing.

When told that I was working as an office manager, the friend was a bit shocked, “I thought Audra would be more successful than that. She was so smart in school!”

I also was in shock after hearing of this exchange, but for a totally different reason.

Why would I not be considered successful because I am working as an office manager?

Seriously. It’s a great job and has given me invaluable skills, which I can use for the rest of my life.

I decided to not step into the success trap at that moment. It was not an easy choice. My worth was on the line and I had to dig deep, calling on my courage to stand against the norm.  

success failure

The definition of success today is so skewed and so narrow that I refuse to be defined by it.

Here are two phrases that I want to eliminate:

I’m just a…..


I’m only a…..

Nothing good follows these phrases.

Stop measuring your worth by the status of “importance” your job receives from society. You are worth so much more than any artificial label can give you.

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